Do you smoke do you drink
Do your armpits tend to stink
Why'd you dye your messy hair
Do you change your underwear
Sorry we should really go
We were here to see a show
Meeting you's been such a treat
Yo your dad is super sweet
Maybe I wasn't clear
You two are staying here
Tell me about your work
You gotta job your little jerk
Yeah about that
No Sir I'm still in school
Learning is pretty cool
One day with my degree
You'll never be as good as me
This may seem impolite
But we were not planning to invite
Our parents don't take this as slight
Enjoy the rest of your funkin' Friday night
Do you spit or pick your nose
Own a gun Wear women's clothes
Suck your thumb or bite your nails
Get beaten up by alpha males
Listen lady
Call me Mom
Normally I'm much more calm
But tonight I'm on a date
So all these questions gotta wait
Got any moles or warts
Rashes of any sort
Do you eat human meat
Suckle at the devil's teat
What does that even mean
I'm just a normal teen
Do you know the muffin man
Or have a Roth retirement plan
This may seem impolite
But we were not planning to invite
Our parents don't take this as slight
Enjoy the rest of your funkin' Friday night
Please give your perspective
On modern non objective art
Sorry no thanks I gotta be frank
That we're due to depart
Do you have tattoos
What size are the shoes your wearing
We need to know has your appendix been removed
What's your blood type Been to Spain
Were you ever potty trained
Do you recycle glass and cans
Tell us all your future plans
Mom since you've shown up
Things have really blown up
Look at me I'm a grown up
I can make my own decisions
Girlfriend don't be silly
Do you think he's really
Good enough for you
Is this the best you can do
Sure he's not drop dead gorgeous
Smells like old spice and oranges
I don't really mind
Plus they say that love is blind
Does he brush twice a day
Eat gluten soy eggs or whey
See you don't even know
This dumb kid has got to go
You're being so unfair
He's not a creep I swear
We'll be together forever
Our kids will have blue hair
I don't care if you're right
I love him just as he is despite
He's not a big star or socialite
He's just a great date for this funky Friday night
You're always so uptight
And dad is all bark and zero bite
Whatever go fly a flippin' kite
You're not the boss of this funky
Friday Night