Counting backwards I don't know what I've been feeling

Steering forward, I'm starting to feel it weaken

Tell me how I've chosen to carry on

Even though I've felt like I've lost it all

It's kind of funny when I'm helpless

I choose to blame myself and help less

Though I'm pushing every day to move along

I can feel the weakness I'm giving up

And all these thoughts filling my head

I just don't know if I can take it

So I've been sleeping with the sirens

Chasing any feeling of excitement

Once I had it all

But seeking desires I grew tired of never having it

Focused on living in the now rather planning it

When all along wishing I could have managed it

Yeah

F**k it I'll be taking off

Cause I know I can do no wrong anymore

Tired of the life I've owned

Building walls between the ones I love

What the hell

Speaking like I've truly grown

But I'm standing at the lowest low

I've ever known

Hoping I can make it home

Cause I'm struggling to find the will to carry on

Tryna find my way back home

Thinking how my life is so

F**g unpredictable

Struggling to find control

Watching as I lose my soul

I'm walking down an endless road

Fighting for the ones I love

But I've never felt more alone

Yeah yeah

Holding conversations with my demons

Yeah

Cuz they're the only ones that seem to listen

Truth from in the heart of all these visions

Yeah

And I'm terrified I'm lost here in this prison

What if there's a part of me I've always been scared to show

Now that I've been isolated feels like I belong alone

Could I just be afraid that I'll be struggling until I'm gone

Or maybe there's a chance that I'll be strong enough to say that I'm wrong

I've been tryna break these chains

Shackled to the feeling that I'll always stay

The very same

Broken people seem to claim

That the world is here to make them fade away

Listen to the words I've said

I've been fighting all the fears in my head

Breakaway

Sick of all the constant dread

To the point where imma make the change

Tryna find my way back home

Thinking how my life is so

F**g unpredictable

Struggling to find control

Watching as I lose my soul

I'm walking down an endless road

Fighting for the ones I love

But I've never felt more alone

Yeah yeah

Holding conversations with my demons

Yeah

Cuz they're the only ones that seem to listen

Truth from in the heart of all these visions

Yeah

And I'm terrified I'm lost here in this prison

I don't wanna go there

Back in to the deepest part of my mind

I always thought I knew that

I could get lost and slow down time

And I don't wanna know that

All my demons they love to lie

But only when I'm broken

Do they make me feel alive