I don't know how deep to go but imma let it all out so come peep the show

Got my first xaney of my mate I ain't gonna say his name

It was fun at the start I used to treat it like a game

This around the time when The Nebulizer dropped

I was on all types of s**t but there's one I couldn't stop

And it played with my brain but I focused on the music

I focused so much didn't realise I abused it

Never had a plan to stop not in that prediction

Going through fame couldn't see I had addictions

1 turned to 2 turned to 3 turned to 4 then I need about 6 a day a little bit more

Mixing it with lean gotta stop people seeing

What damages can be by looking at me s**t

What to do cause I feel like a fool and I hate any rapper making xaney's look cool

Shit was getting bad I was filled up with hateful

Thoughts in my mind I would argue with April

Agreed I would stop s**t I'd give it a go

By the first f**g night felt like slitting my throat

Second night my body shaking

The ambulance appear and I'm thinking in my mind what the f**k they doing here

Suddenly I'm caught up and there's no time to muck round

Lucky I got here cause my body 'bout to shut down

Back to square one nah man you can't quit

You gotta wean yourself off that's some hard s**t

What the f**k man my brain is a mess

I can't remember that much feel the pain in my legs

I wish it was that easy I could give up and go

And people still got the hide to tell me pick up my phone

Maybe that's my fault I didn't speak on it much

I didn't see if as a problem I would keep it from c**s

Rates could always tell when I couldn't pronounce certain words brain dead

Yeah should I be proud

Anxiety was killin' me the doctors couldn't deal with me

Put me on a program cut me down on the pills and weed

All scared cause I feel on my own

I told 'em "let me chill' now they think I'm dissing them bro

Waking up tired I gotta take more pills

And I didn't even wanna take 'em is this f**n for real

Losing touch of myself it's like reality's false

It's like I'm walking around without having a pulse

It's a feeling of death or like nothing is left

Cause there I'm holding my chest just put a hole in my head

You see the older I get It's getting scary as f**k

I'm like an eighteen in the head I weren't aware of those drugs

The s**t that they cause I talk to mirrors on walls

I don't need this s**t ever but to pills I will fall

I opened up on 'No Rest' told c**s everything

That I done ice didn't leave out anything

I quit that s**t yeah I left it flat dead

That was 5 years ago they still think I'm a crackhead

If that's what we going off f**k me dead

In 5 years I'll be clean they'll be calling me a xaney head

Funny how the world works for a paycheck

Once the fame hit I became a train wreck

I wasn't s**t anyway so why does it count

Why so many people love me I can't figure it out

But I'm telling you now don't you follow my path

Look you couldn't if you tried cause I'm going in hard

F**k a poppin a pill just to go out today

How'd I end up like this I don't know it's a way

Well I'm blaming the fame yeah I said it before

But it's enough to make me high feel like ending it all but I

Brush it off got my fans on my side too

And my girl and my brothers and the whole crew

Spilling the truth it's like all I can do

That's why I don't have time for rappers that are saying they're true

When they lie to their fans apologize in the end

I never lied to mine and this is why I'm the man

I tell you what I'm going through I don't care what they think

That's why I'm triple popping pills leaning over the sink

I'm almost f**n crying as I'm writing this s**t

Cause of all my close ones and the lives I affect

I came from the bottom I made it my problem

Created the option now fame has adoptin'

My brain gotta stop it insane I am not this

Strange we got Scot sick imma watch a clock tick

Just f**k off I said it just f**k off

If I won't have my tablets I'll find a bridge to jump off

F**n idiots thinking that the s**t is cool

'Till they dyin' in the vomit of there own drool

What I meant to say Don't do what I done

I've cut down on the program yeah I've won

Repped it from the street turned into a star then

Caught a f**n habit on the xanex but the bars went

Crazy and I'm just dealing with fame

I just want my fans to know that I'll still be the same I'm good