Written by ： Mike Olson

I knew a boy way back when

His name was bobby and then

He asked my daddy if I could go dancing

But he could not make a pass

Can't tell his elbow from ass

He was completely inept at romancing

Oh bobby

It's so painful to watch you

Well in a crowd I could spot you

Oh bobby

You'll never nail her

What a spectacular failure

He's got a buddy named jack

Who likes to take it as fact

That he and bobby have all of the power

But don't believe what he says

Cuz jack's gone soft in the head

And bob and jack play grab ass in the shower

Oh bobby

You play out every delusion

You're better off in seclusion

Oh bobby

You've never looked paler

What a spectacular failure

Oh bobby

You don't appear to be dying

It's like you're not even trying

I can't excuse your behavior

What a spectacular failure

What a spectacular failure

What a spectacular failure

What a spectacular failure

What a spectacular failure