I plopped down in my easy chair and turned on Channel Two

A bad gunslinger called Salty Sam was chasin' poor Sweet Sue

He trapped her in the old sawmill and said with an evil laugh

If you don't give me the deed to your ranch

I'll saw you all in half

And then he grabbed her and then

He tied her up and then

He turned on the bandsaw and then and then

And then along came Jones

Tall thin Jones

Slow-walkin' Jones

Slow-talkin' Jones

Along came long lean lanky Jones

Commercial came on so I got up to get myself a snack

You should've seen what was goin' on by the time that

I got back

Down in the old abandoned mine Sweet Sue was a-havin' fits

That villain said give me the deed to your ranch or

I'll blow you all to bits

And then he grabbed her and then

He tied her up and then

He lit the fuse to the dynamite and then and then

And then along came Jones

Tall thin Jones

Slow-walkin' Jones

Slow-talkin' Jones

Along came long lean lanky Jones

I got so bugged

I turned it off and turned on another show

But there was the same old shoot-'em-up and the same old rodeo

Salty Sam was tryin' to stuff

Sweet Sue in a burlap sack he said

If you don't give me the deed to your ranch

I'm gonna throw you on the railroad tracks

And then he grabbed her and then

He tied her up and then

A train started comin' and then and then

And then along came Jones

Tall thin Jones

Slow-walkin' Jones

Slow-talkin' Jones

Along came long lean lanky Jones

Along came long lean lanky Jones

Along came long lean lanky Jones