Manic Depressive Pictures presents ROAR roar)
“ Hello Fresno Goodbye ”
Now you know the name of the picture
And you ' d like to see it — But no
Screenplay by Gluck from a stageplay by Mutsk
From a story by Glip from a chapter by Rusk
From a sentence by Dokes from a comma by Spokes
From an idea by Grokes based on Joe Miller ' s jokes
Now you know the name of the picture and who wrote it
And you ' d still like to see it — But no
Art direction Pickepup interiors Minervipup
Photography Alonzotech recorded sound by Needlepeck
Upholstery by Thackery Hackery by Dackery
Hickory by Dickory and Dickory for Doc 66971,-720)
Now finally — finally at last comes the picture
And what do we see
The same old beautiful chorus girls
The opening scene is a ranch in Fresno California
So what are they singing
When it ' s cherry blossom time in Orange New Jersey
We ' ll make a peach of a pair I know we canteloup
So honeydew be mine — and dip:
Up on the gulch rides a hunk of man
He is our hero Cowboy Dan
A gallopin ' yodelin ' buckaroo
His horse of course is a baritone too
I ' ve got that oooollllldd wagon wheels inside of me Yi-hi-hoo)
I ' ve got that ooooold cactus in the hide of me yi-hi-hoo)
I ' ve got that yi-hi-hoo)
The girls are delighted to hear this mew ew ew ew)
But where is our heroine 141320,-189)
As the bell rings for lunch we find our heroine in the corral
Eating her heart out
She is Mary Sue Ann tap-dancing daughter or an American juggling act
Who left her on the doorstep of an old English castle
Where she was found by Sir Basil Metabolism who said:
By jove the Gorin baby; I shall raise her as me-own daughter which he did)
But she wants to tap dance and Cowboy Dan who she met on this trip
Wants to marry her so she can tap dance but she knows
Sir Basil will never permit this Never never never
mewewewewe)
But through her tears she is singing a happy little song
Because she is also a coluratura soprano
loo loo loo looo etc )
She is beside herself her favorite position)
Oh Father you must let me marry Cowboy Dan
He owns the biggest ranch in Texas Bar None
Bar None Why that ' s the password for the FBI
It can ' t be No no yes yes no no yes yes no no yes yes no no yes yes
It can ' t be But it was
He rushes to Mary Sue Ann: “ Mary Sue Ann can you help me out
Can you tap out a mssage in code “
This is her big chance now she can tap dance which she does)
But what has she done She has betrayed her own father
But he isn ' t her father He ' s Henrik the dangerous German spy
Stick up our hands you dirty rat
So ah-ah-ah-ah the FBI has finally captured the German spy
Dan and Mary are about to blend you think the picture ' s about to end
But no
Whoever heard of a musical picture without Carmelita Pepita
The Bolivian bombshell
“ I wish you would come with me to my little village in Bolivia
So peaceful there in the purple mountains and the lovely mist
And the shining stars And the little people who live so simple and quiet
And every night all they want to do is ”
Grab your partner swing away it ' s cherry blossom time in Orange New J
Grab her by the feet and swing her by the hair and you will make
A peach of a pair Oh grant
So here we are back in Fresno California And this is where you came in
But do not fret my friend This is a picture that ends in the middle for the
Benefit of the people who came in – in the middle
This — this is The End