I hollered Hey honey I'm home

Like I do every day at four

But the TV ain't on and the car is gone

She must be at the store

Then I spied this piece of paper

It looked like a list of things to do

But when I got down to number six

I realized we were through

One

The plumber couldn't make it today

Two

I've decided that I'm going away

Three

The dog's at the vet the hearing is set

Do you see what I'm trying to say

Five

Don't forget to take out the trash

Six

I'm sorry but I'm not coming back

You can't sugar coat what she really wrote

Now ain't that a hell of a note

I just stood there and scratched my head

As my chin dropped to the floor

But not even a tear after all these years

I expected a little bit more

I was countin' on grabbin' a good cold beer

Stretchin' out on the couch

But she went by the numbers

And I got counted out

One

The plumber couldn't make it today

Two

I've decided that I'm going away

Three

The dog's at the vet the hearing is set

Do you see what I'm trying to say

Five

Don't forget to take out the trash

Six

I'm sorry but I'm not coming back

You can't sugar coat what she really wrote

Now ain't that a hell of a note

Ah ain't that a hell of a note