You see
Taxis are Ubers
The stars are YouTubers
Neil Tyson gave Pluto the axe
Cell phones got smarter
The oceans got hotter
The global economy collapsed
We get internet deals
On our hyphenate meals
Like cage-free, Vegan-Paleo sausage
We don't leave our homes
Thanks to Amazon drones
They track what we do
Through our watches
What's going on? Will we be okay?
Has it all gone mad since we went away?
Oh update us please, and put us at ease
Cuz we've run out of jokes
About the 90s
Al Gore lost bad
'cause of one hanging chad
Dubya hunted for Dubya-em-dees
Obama brought hope
So Clinton thought "Dope!"
"Twenty-sixteen should be a real breeze"
(So, Hillary finally broke that glass ceiling?)
(No, but it certainly does feel like it's raining shards of glass all around us)
The country's cut into two
The red and the blue
Facebook's a toxic waste dump
The Fox friends are doting
The Russians are voting
And now there's a President Trump
(At least, we think there's still a President Trump)
(You see, the writers are writing this in 2018)
(How is that possible?)
(The people rely on Animaniacs for outrageous and relevant content)
(Well, how can we finish catching up when we don't know happened in the last two years?)
(I don't know, wild guesses?)
(Sounds good to me!)
We have chips in our brains
We no longer feel pain
There are worsening climate disasters
Now we live underground
And we can't make a sound
Lest we anger our polar bear masters
(They've come south for revenge!)
We breed birds without arms
On our factory farms
And we live in aluminum bunkers
We sent humans to Mars
All the food comes in bars
And the top-rated show is called "Clunkers!"
(It's about a talking police car!)
(Who's also a time machine!)
(Wow, here comes the star, Clunko!)
(I travel through time, solving crime!)
That's what's going on
In the world today
It's as crazy now
As when we went away
Our ratings depend
On knowing the trends
We're all caught up
That's how this song ends!
