My dear Helen it's been a while since we've talked

Charlie and I haven't been up to a whole lot

He's slowing down a little and my knee's acting up

Yeah we're quite a pair of geezers

Moving slower than molasses

You'd be laughing if you saw us

You always loved to tease

I dug up an old bottle of your raspberry wine

So I'm slouched out on the

Porch-swing just taking my time

My mind keeps turning out these pictures of you

You were dancing in the kitchen

And I was enjoying my view

Oh Charlie was squirming

Just two steps behind you

My dear Helen do you remember when you said

That you'd be waiting at the gates

So you could sneak me in

Well it sure was funny

But it still caught in my throat

And when I think about it now

It still makes me choke

And I wonder if those gates

Would ever open up for me

Helen my dear I do have something to tell

I don't know how to start so I guess I just will

See these nights have been hot

It's that muggy sort of air

Doesn't let me get to sleep

So I usually just lie there

On top of my quilt with Charlie by my feet

Last night as I laid there frustrated and tired

I was sat up in my bed

By the hens starting wild

I thought 'that fox is back again

He's gonna rob me blind

I don't know how he gets in

But I'd better make him fly'

So I took my leaning rifle out the door

I fired off a shot aiming far into the heat

And as soon as it was flying

I felt weak in my knees

I heard shoes turning gravel

And then tires spitting rocks

I heard a gasp for air

And my stomach tied in knots

Charlie started whining

With his tail between his legs

We wandered out slow

But my heart was breakin' ribs

I couldn't hear nothing

And there was a girl lying twisted

My hands were trembling

And I felt that she was limp

Her pulse wasn't tapping

So I felt sick to my stomach

Charlie was frozen

So I went for a shovel

And I buried her body

I didn't know what else to do

If I'd only aimed a little higher

If I'd only thought before I fired

I hope God can forgive me

I hope you forgive me too

I'm just a tired old man just waiting to join you

So here I am slouched on this old porch swing

Thinking about heaven thinking about everything

So be waiting by those gates

You might need to sneak me in

I don't know how they feel about us accidental killers

I don't know how they feel about us tired old men

I don't know how they feel about us tired

Old murdering men

I don't know how they feel about us tired

Old murdering men

My Dear Helen - Andy Shauf