Welcome to the fucking show.
This is a story about us.
A story about people.
Humans.
And monsters.
Monsters.
Underneath the bed.
One wrong move, and I'm gonna smash your head.
No.
I'm awesome, man.
Y 'all don't need to admit it.
Little motherfucker!
Stop jumping on the bed!
Jet! Jet! Jet! Jet!
Jet! Uh!
Breaking down weed on my platinum plaque.
Breaking down weed on my platinum plaque.
Breaking down weed on a...
Jet! Jet! Jet!
Say what you want, I don't give a crap.
Breaking down weed on my platinum plaque.
Smoking on this, smoking on that.
Exotic weed, yeah, stick to the clock.
When I light up a stick and hit it, I don't pass.
I don't gotta sign a deal, I'm a pass.
You working a nine -to -five, your life is ass.
I'd rather die than be a slave to a corporation.
If you're working at your job right now, go quit.
You can say what you want, they don't give a shit.
You are less than dirt, you are worse than spit.
Fuck all of you niggas, you can suck my dick.
And if I was a woman, you could lick my clit.
And if I was China, I'd nuke this shit.
And if I was water, I would still drip.
And if I was you, I would just quit.
And if it was me, I am me.
I'm glad I'm me.
I never got no jewelry on me.
I never got no expensive car.
I never got time.
Most of the time, I'm thinking about rhymes.
I'm thinking about bars.
Thinking about buying land for a farm.
Big -ass shotgun on my arm.
Thinking about growing beans and corn.
Thinking about moving real far.
Yeah, you can say what you want, I don't give a crap.
Ever since I got this platinum plaque,
I've been caring less and less and less about that.
I'm sure that there's a lesson in that.
If it ain't what I want, the election is hacked.
New American Revolution on the track.
You're telling me the CIA got people addicted to crack?
You're telling me that the government isn't on our side?
Isn't that shit just a joke at this point?
Do we even really care that the government lies?
Do we even really hate what we say we despise?
Do we even really think what we think we think?
Is there fluoride in the water we drink?
Did the FBI calcify your third eye?
Hello!
I hope you have been enjoying the song so far.
Please take a moment
to replenish your nutrients
and water
and things like that
before we open up the pit
here in a moment.
You know what? I'm gonna go get some water.
Here to entertain you
is my favorite musical group.
It's called Sounds...
a bunch of sounds.
It's my favorite band.
Okay, goodbye.
Go fuck yourself.
Hey, I'm back.
I'm back.
You can only get this big a rat with a contract.
Yo, Darkie, we want to take you out to a meal.
We genuinely really care about how you feel.
No one else has ever had this kind of deal.
No one's ever had this kind of arrangement.
Don't you want all your friends to be famous?
You don't want to remain nameless, do you?
We promise we won't screw you.
Yeah, I like that one a lot.
Why did you tell them that we have a platinum plaque, though?
I don't know. It's like a metaphor.
Also, it sounds cool.
Did you have to, like...
Did you have to low -key lie to everybody
to get that message across?
Oh, no, but I guess I'd make a really good
politician or news anchor,
if you know what I'm saying.
