Baker: It's because of you there's a giant in our midst,
and my wife is dead!
Jack: But it isn't my fault
I was given those beans!
You persuaded me to trade away my cow for beans!
And without those beans, there'd have been no stalk
To get up to the giant in the first place!
Baker: Wait a minute, magic beans for a cow so old
That you had to tell a lie to sell it, which you told!
Were they worthless beans? Were they oversold?
Oh, and tell us who persuaded you to steal that gold!
LRRH: See, it's your fault
Jack: No!
Baker: So it's your fault.
Jack: No!
LRRH: Yes, it is!
Jack: It's not!
Baker: It's true
Jack: Wait a minute, though--
I only stole the gold to get my cow back
From you!
LRRH: So it's your fault!
Jack: Yes!
Baker: No, it isn't!
I'd have kept those beans, but our house was cursed
She made us get a cow to get the curse reversed!
Witch: It's his father's fault that the curse got placed
And the place got cursed in the first place!
LRRH: Oh. Then it's his fault!
Witch: So
Cinderella: It was his fault.
Jack: No
Baker: Yes, it is, it's his
Cinderella: I guess.
Jack: Wait a minute, though--
I chopped down the beanstalk, right? That's clear
But without any beanstalk, then what's queer
Is how did the second giant get down here
In the first place?
.second place.
Cinderella: Yes!
LRRH: How?
Baker: Hmm.
Jack: Well, who had the other bean?
Baker: The other bean?
Cinderella: The other bean?
Jack: You pocketed the other bean
Baker: I didn't!
Yes, I did
LRRH: So it's your f--!
Baker: No, it isn't, cause I gave it to my wife!
LRRH: So it's her f--!
Baker: NO, IT ISN'T!
Cinderella: Then whose is it?
Baker: Wait a minute! She exchanged that bean to obtain your shoe
So the one who knows what happened to the bean is you!
Cinderella: You mean that old bean-- that your wife--? Oh, dear--
But I never knew, and so I threw--
Well, don't look here!
LRRH: So it's your fault!
Cinderella: But--
Jack: See, it's her fault--
Cinderella: But--
Jack: And it isn't mine at all!
Baker: But what?
Cinderella: Well, if you hadn't gone back up again--
Jack: We were needy--
Cinderella: You were greedy! Did you need that hen?
Jack: But I got it for my mother--!
LRRH: So it's her fault then!
Cinderella: Yes, and what about the harp in the third place?
Baker: The harp--yes!
Jack: She went and dared me to!
LRRH: I dared you to?
Jack: You dared me to!
She said that I was scared to. She dared me!
LRRH: No, I didn't!
Baker, Cinderella, Jack: So it's your fault!
LRRH: Wait a minute--!
Cinderella: If you hadn't dared him to--
Baker And you had left the harp alone
We wouldn't be in trouble in the first place!
LRRH: Well, if you hadn't thrown away the bean
In the first place--!
It was your fault!
Well, if she hadn't raised them in the first place--!
Jack: Yes, if you hadn't raised them in the first place--!
LRRH, Baker: Right! It's you who raised them in the first place--!
Cinderella: You raised the beans in the first place!
Jack: It's YOUR fault!
Cinderella, Jack, LRRH, Baker: You're responsible!
You're the one to blame!
It's your fault!
Witch: Shhhhhhhhhhh!
It's the last midnight
It's the last wish
It's the last midnight
Soon it will be boom--
Squish!
Told a little lie, stole a little gold, broke a little vow
Did you?
Had to get your Prince, had to get your cow
Have to get your wish, doesn't matter how.
Anyway, it doesn't matter now
It's the last midnight
It's the boom--
Splat!
Nothing but a vast midnight
Everybody smashed flat!
Nothing we can do...
Not exactly true:
We can always give her the boy...
No?
No, of course, what really matters is the blame
Somebody to blame
Fine, if that's the thing you enjoy, placing the blame
If that's the aim, give me the blame
Just give me the boy
No?
You're so nice
You're not good, you're not bad
You're just nice
I'm not good, I'm not nice
I'm just right
I'm the witch
You're the world
I'm the hitch, I'm what no one believes
I'm the witch
You're all liars and thieves
Like his father!
Like his son will be too!
Oh, why bother?
You'll just do what you do!
It's the last midnight
So goodbye, all
Coming at you fast, midnight--
Soon you'll see the sky fall!
Here, you want a bean?
Have another bean
Beans were made for making you rich!
Plant them and they soar--
Here, you want some more?
Listen to the roar:
Giants by the score--!
Oh well, you can blame another witch
It's the last midnight
It's the last verse
Now, before it's past midnight
I'm leaving you my last curse:
I'm leaving you alone
You can tend the garden, it's yours
Separate and alone
Everybody down on all fours
All right, Mother, when?
Lost the beans again!
Punish me the way you did then!
Give me claws and a hunch
Just away from this bunch
And the gloom
And the doom
And the boom
Cruuuunch!
