when i was younger i lived with an open heart

when one love fell over another soon would start

but i'm not like that

anymore

for the first time in my life

my heart is a closed door

oh i used to be so afraid of being alone

in my company

but turns out it's alright

it gives me everything

everything i need

and sometimes it's hard

hard i'm aware

that this heavy heart

is a heavy load to bear

i thought i was ready to take on a casual lover

it looked good in my mind

but turns out that using my body without my heart

it just doesn't feel right

and it was so hard

hard to say

that this heavy heart

i just can't give away

well i have been trying to live in my truth everyday

so much more

been learning to listen to the voices inside that i

that i used to ignore

and it is so hard

hard to hear

my heavy heart

speaks so loud and clear

so if i'm being honest if i'm speaking truth

not a day goes by where i don't think of you

and right now we are not talking because you never call

and i'm so mad about it cause i'm still expecting more

though i know that you don't owe me

my feelings are so strong

they keep reminding me that i'm still holding on

so sick of holding on

sick of writing these songs about you

what to do

when i was younger i lived with an open heart

when one love fell over

another sin would start

but i'm not like that

anymore

for the first time in my life

my heart is a closed door