All right!
Stop whatcha doin'
'cause I'm about to ruin
the image and the style that ya used to.
I look funny,
but yo I'm makin' money, see
so yo world I hope you're ready for me.
Now gather round
I'm the new fool in town
and my sound's laid down
by the Underground.
I drink up all the Hennessey
ya got on ya shelf
so just let me introduce myself
My name is Humpty,
pronounced with a Umpty.
Yo ladies, oh how I like to hump thee.
And all the rappers in the top
ten please allow me to bump thee.
I'm steppin' tall, y'all,
and just like Humpty Dumpty
you're gonna fall when
the stereos pump me.
I like to rhyme,
I like my beats funky,
I'm spunky. I like my oatmeal lumpy.
I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack
but sometimes I get ridiculous
I'll eat up all your
crackers and your licorice
hey yo fat girl, c'mere are ya ticklish?
Yeah, I called ya fat.
Look at me, I'm skinny
It never stopped me from gettin' busy
I'm a freak
I like the girls with the boom
I once got busy in a
Burger King bathroom
I'm crazy.
Allow me to amaze thee.
They say I'm ugly but
it just don't faze me.
I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants
and I even got my own dance
The Humpty Dance is your
chance to do the hump
Do the Humpty Hump, come
on and do the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, just
watch me do the Humpty Hump
Do ya know what I'm doin',
doin' the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
People say "Yo, Humpty,
you're really funny lookin'"
that's all right 'cause
I get things cookin'
Ya stare, ya glare, ya
constantly try to compare me
but ya can't get near me
I give 'em more, see,
and on the floor, B,
all the girls they adore me
Oh yes, ladies, I'm really bein' sincere
'cause in a 69 my humpty
nose will tickle ya rear.
My nose is big, uh uh I'm not ashamed
Big like a pickle, I'm
still gettin' paid
I get laid by the ladies,
ya know I'm in charge,
both how I'm livin' and my nose is large
I get stoopid, I shoot
an arrow like Cupid,
I use a word that don't
mean nothin', like looptid
I sang on Doowhutchalike,
and if ya missed it,
I'm the one who said just
grab 'em in the biscuits
Also told ya that I like to bite
Well, yeah, I guess it's
obvious, I also like to write.
All ya had to do was
give Humpty a chance
and now I'm gonna do my dance.
The Humpty Dance is your
chance to do the hump
Do the Humpty Hump, come
on and do the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, just
watch me do the Humpty Hump
Do ya know what I'm doin',
doin' the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
Oh, yeah, that's the break, y'all
Let me hear a little bit of
that bass groove right here
Oh, yeah!
Now that I told ya a
little bit about myself
let me tell ya a little
bit about this dance
It's real easy to do check it out
First I limp to the side
like my leg was broken
Shakin' and twitchin'
kinda like I was smokin'
Crazy wack funky
People say ya look like M.C.
Hammer on crack, Humpty
That's all right 'cause
my body's in motion
It's supposed to look like
a fit or a convulsion
Anyone can play this game
This is my dance, y'all,
Humpty Hump's my name
No two people will do it the same
Ya got it down when ya
appear to be in pain
Humpin', funkin', jumpin',
jig around, shakin' ya rump,
and when the dude a chump pump
points a finger like a stump
tell him step off, I'm doin' the Hump.
The Humpty Dance is your
chance to do the hump
Do the Humpty Hump, come
on and do the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, just
watch me do the Humpty Hump
Do ya know what I'm doin',
doin' the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
Black people, do the Humpty
Hump, do the Humpty Hump
White people, do the Humpty
Hump, do the Humpty Hump
Puerto Ricans, do the Humpty
Hump, just keep on doin' the hump
Samoans, do the Humpty
Hump, do the Humpty Hump
Let's get stoopid!
