I just bought me a great long ticket

I'm gonna use it at 4 p m

So you can call your secret love and break the news to him

You thought your little romance was on the strict Q T

So if you want your freedom P D Q Divorce me C O D

You can reach me down in Dallas at general delivery

So if you want your freedom P D Q Divorce me C O D

There's gonna come a day gal when you'll be feeling blue

You'll find you can't pay your bills with a little ole' I O U

This dynamite your messing with may be T N T

So if you want your freedom P D Q Divorce me C O D

I ain't no college professor n'ain't got no P H D

So if you want your freedom P D Q Divorce me C O D

I won't be round to hear you cry

I'm Texas bound and bye and bye

You can reach me down in Dallas at general delivery

So if you want your freedom P D Q Divorce me C O D