The outside world recoils in fear

Thinking if they slip up, they'll get locked up in here

You're killing yourself to make ends meet

While I'm workin' on my tan and kicking up my feet

You can't beat livin' in prison, there's always something to do

And you know who's paying, everyone but you

Every day I wake up to a nice hot shower

Don't pay the water bill so I'm scrubbing for hours

Shoot some hoops and lift weights in the yard

Maybe blow off some steam, shiv a rookie guard

And there's nothing more exquisite

Than when I get my 14 minute conjugal visits

C'mon and meet the gang

There's Jimmy the Pickle, and Shithole Hank

He makes the best hooch wine in his toilet tank

There's Bam-Bam, and Tiny, and Sparkles McGee

And every single one of us scumbags agree

I don't wanna be free (I don't wanna be free)

Leave me in luxury (leave me in luxury)

Why try a prison break

When hard time is totally great

I got a trash pedigree (I got a trash pedigree)

But in here I'm bourgeoisie (hey ma', look at me)

I never think about the world beyond

Then I'd recall how I killed my mom

No! I don't wanna be

Free! Not the life for me

No! I don't wanna be free

Of these amenities

If I tried to live this good out there

I'd have to be a thousandaire

This is where I wanna grow old

So I'm just praying I don't make parole

'Cause I don't wanna be free